I used to think of myself as a patient person...then I prayed for it. After that it was as though God began to give me every available opportunity to learn just how impatient I really am. Whether it be getting caught behind that ridiculously slow driver that is barely crawling down the street or having to deal with that individual who clearly set out to push all my buttons that day, patience can be learned in a variety of ways.
For me, it has been hardest to learn in relation to my future. I'm the kind of person that likes to plan. I schedule everything in advance and am definitely not a fan of spontaneity. So, when God began to tug at my heart, as far as the calling He has placed on my life, I was more than ready to do what I needed to do in order to accomplish that goal. Little did I know that I would have to wait for it.
Waiting is not an easy process. Waiting PATIENTLY is even harder.
"Wait on the Lord; Be of good courage, And He will strengthen your heart; Wait, I say, on the Lord!" Psalm 27:14
God rarely fulfills His promises when we expect. Sometimes it's years before we begin to see His plan unfolding before our eyes and even then it's usually just a glimpse, but not one minute off that time is wasted. It's in that moment when we are able to grow in our faith, patience, and trust in Lord.
These past few months have been nothing but a growing and stretching process for me. I used to think I had my life pretty under control. I knew the basic direction I was heading and what I wanted for my life. Though my life hadn't panned out quite the way I had imagined or in the timing I had wanted, I was patient in trusting my Father who held my life in His hands. Or so I thought until my life took a detour and I was struggling to hold all the pieces together.
"A man's heart plans his way, But the Lord directs his steps." Proverbs 16:9
Planning in itself is not a bad thing. It's when you and I begin to take our lives in our own hands and stop waiting patiently on God to guide and direct our footsteps is when it becomes a problem. I have come to grips with the fact that I was doing just that. I've always had my life planned out, but somewhere along the lines I put God in the backseat and thought myself more capable of handling my circumatances. Nothing could be farther from the truth. God has clearly showed me that I am not in control of my life, but thankfully, He is.
No matter what comes my way, it's all for a specific reason designed by Him. Nothing I go through is ever a surprise to Him. Everything passes through His hands first. Throughout this process He has been faithfully teaching me to trust Him, to rely on Him and His strength, and to have patience while I am in this waiting period.
No, I have no idea where I will be four months from now. Yes, my life seems to be a huge question mark at this point. But, for the first time in my life, I'm ok with that. I know God is in control and I know all He wants is for me to come along for the ride. Part of the joy in the destination is the journey getting there.
"Being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ." Philippians 1:6
The work He is doing in us is not finished. We just need to stop interfering with the process and allow Him to work...to have patience and wait.
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